


The Drifter and the Fixed Star

by Lintoro



Category: Thor (Movies)
Genre: Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie) Spoilers, Canon Divergence - Thor (2011), M/M, Mindfuck, Time Shenanigans
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-09
Updated: 2018-10-09
Packaged: 2019-07-28 19:37:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,790
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16248449
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lintoro/pseuds/Lintoro
Summary: During the months preceding Thor's ascension to the throne, Heimdall finds his vigil increasingly compromised by Loki's growing and inexplicable presence.





	The Drifter and the Fixed Star

"You wish to travel?"  
  
It was an inane question, but as Loki continued to stand in front of him with his hands flat to his sides, looking up at him with practised innocence without volunteering a single word of explanation, Heimdall had to say something.  
  
Loki kept his expression level and shook his head. "I have travelled enough for now. I would simply like to view the dome."  
  
Heimdall raised an eyebrow, well aware Loki couldn't see the movement behind his helmet. He'd come to the Bifrost alone late in the evening to merely admire its architecture? There wasn't a single soul dwelling in Asgard who wouldn't have found the request highly suspicious in its simplicity. "To what end?"  
  
"Will you deny me if I tell you there isn't one?"  
  
Heimdall considered this. He was well within his rights to tell Loki to quit wasting his time, and barring some unofficial retribution he could expect it to be the final word on the subject.  
  
"You're not to touch anything," he finally said, "nor to leave anything behind."  
  
A thin smile which disappeared as soon as it appeared rose to Loki's lips. "Very well."  
  
With nothing else left to be said, Heimdall took a step to the right and allowed Loki to pass before following him into the dome, more puzzled by the moment. Surely, this was a part of some kind of mischief: whenever he wasn't surveying the other eight worlds for potential threats to the realm, Heimdall turned his gaze to Asgard itself, and though he had never witnessed him plotting anything actively threatening the kingdom, he felt he had a good grasp of Loki's character and the kinds of things he was capable of. He was intelligent, no doubt, and resourceful, but both good qualities had been twisted into the service of disruptions both minor and not so minor, often played at his brother.  
  
He kept a close eye on Loki the entire time he surveyed the dome. To his surprise, he paid but cursory attention to the pedestal, instead craning his neck to view the ever-shifting wheels and the glimmering galaxies beyond the bridge. His gaze lingered on one gear in particular, which as far as Heimdall knew was no different from the rest, with an expression of mild awe. After a long silence, he smoothed out his hair and walked past Heimdall back onto the rainbow bridge.  
  
Heimdall had already returned to his usual place of vigil when Loki suddenly turned, still looking impassive.  
  
"Thank you," he said.  
  
Heimdall stared after him long after he had crossed the bridge.

 

* * *

  
  
In the following days, he paid closer than usual attention to what the second prince of Asgard was up to. For the most part, he appeared to be studying, poring over old tomes and scribbling down endless notes, sometimes pausing to stare into the distance for minutes at a time. For the rest, he carried himself as though nothing was amiss, spending time with his brother and his friends and engaging in minor trickery of the mostly harmless sort.  
  
All this only served to trouble him further. His duty-honed instincts told him this was a calm before a storm, but not how tempestuous the storm would be when it finally arrived. It didn't help that though he had witnessed enough of his misdeeds to find Loki mildly distasteful and little cared for his slippery words, he had never had a real reason to suspect he was a threat to anyone except himself.  
  
Therefore, when he re-appeared on the Bifrost two weeks later with writing implements at hand, he only moved aside with reluctance. Yet he still moved.  
  
Loki installed himself in the farthest edge of the dome and began writing without so much as a glance at what he had ostensibly come to see. Heimdall gave him his privacy while he observed Asgard's borders for any approaching threats, but as time passed, he found it increasingly difficult ignore him.  
  
Finally, he walked over. "What are you writing?"  
  
Loki looked up with a wry smile he had half expected. "Would you like to inspect it?"  
  
"That is unnecessary."  
  
"I won't mind."  
  
Heimdall accepted the book pressed into his hand and frowned. The words on the pages were written in a strange mixture of the runes of the Aesir and several other scripts. They could have been in some long-forgotten tongue, perhaps, but it was far likelier Loki was using a cipher.  
  
"Why hide the meaning of your words?" he asked as he handed the notes back.  
  
"Because it isn't necessary for anyone but myself to understand them."  
  
Heimdall straightened his back till his shadow covered the entirety of Loki. "What are you scheming?"  
  
Loki slammed the book shut and set it carefully to his side. He remained seated, staring up at Heimdall longer than anyone had dared meet his gaze for decades.  
  
Heimdall narrowed his eyes. It was perfectly possible, even likely that the secret notes were nothing more than a less than solicitous speech to be unleashed at Thor's upcoming coronation. But why come write them here?         
  
Finally, Loki averted his eyes. "They are plans for the benefit of Asgard. You might not approve of the details, but you would agree with the general principles."  
  
Curiously enough, he had the feeling Loki may well have been telling the truth. "You sound very certain."  
  
"I am certain. We both know where your loyalties lie."  
  
"With the king," Heimdall said at once in a tone meant to brook no argument.  
  
A thin smile. "I would have said with Asgard itself."  
  
"They are one and the same."  
  
The smile widened. Loki was clearly laughing at some private joke, but when he next met Heimdall's eyes, there was unexpected steel in his gaze. "I will keep that in mind."  
  
Heimdall crossed his arms. "Would you like to hear what I think you are up to?"  
  
Loki shrugged. "Why not?"  
  
"I believe you are searching for means to cross to other worlds without using the Bifrost." The amused gleam in Loki's eyes wasn't an answer, exactly, but it emboldened him to continue. "However, I cannot understand why you should return here when you do not so much as pretend to study the mechanisms of the bridge."  
  
Loki picked up his notes with his usual careful, controlled movements. Even the mundane act of standing up and straightening his back was done with the precision of a dancer. "Perhaps I didn't return here to study the bridge, then."  
  
With that, he walked past him, so closely his shoulder brushed against his upper arm. Though he didn't once turn back, Heimdall again found himself following him with his gaze.

 

* * *

  
  
After that, Loki's visits grew more and more frequent. Half the time, he didn't write down a single note and merely sat in his usual spot gazing into space, or else circled the pedestal with no apparent aim, only occasionally turning to glance at Heimdall.  
  
It was beginning to vex him.  
  
He had informed the All-Father of what was going on, in a mild, non-judgemental tone he used to report strange occurrences he didn't think were threats, and had received little more than a distracted nod in response. The king's mind was on something far away, and the curious behaviour of his younger son figured into his thoughts less than the paths of distant stars. He had merely ordered Heimdall to do what he was already doing, to keep an eye on him and make another report if he gained some useful insight into the matter.  
  
He did so, naturally, finding himself slowly getting accustomed to Loki's curiously inoffensive presence, to where he didn't particularly mind when he began to ask him questions about the goings-on in the nine worlds. He listened to his reports with surprising interest, and strangest of all, often remembered to thank him.  
  
Suspicious, indeed.  
  
Still, he was under Heimdall's protection just like everyone else in Asgard, and sometimes Heimdall allowed himself to consider that perhaps nothing was amiss after all. Perhaps Loki was simply lonely and otherwise melancholy due to Thor's impending coronation: Heimdall had observed him in his brother's company, smiling and speaking freely whenever Thor looked at him, only for his expression to turn wistful as soon as he thought no eyes were on him.  
  
Thus, he wasn't entirely surprised when on the night before the coronation, while he was quietly observing the borders of Asgard for any anomalies, Loki stumbled down the Bifrost, his hair somewhat less immaculately slicked back than usual.  
  
"You should sleep," Heimdall observed, briefly wondering what true respite was like before snuffing out the thought.  
  
"It can wait." Loki was slightly drunk, clear enough from his gentle swaying as he walked to the pedestal, but his gaze was steady enough. "The night is still young."  
  
Heimdall stared into space and said nothing. To him, the night was nearly as old as the universe itself, a constant companion to his vigil.  
  
Loki sat down on the lowest rung of the pedestal and turned to stare listlessly at their window into the universe.  
  
"I hope you are not planning anything foolish," Heimdall said after the silence had stretched on for several minutes.  
  
"What?" Loki turned to look at him, blinking with genuine surprise.  
  
"Tomorrow, I mean."  
  
"Oh." Loki's shoulders relaxed even as a shadow of bitterness fell upon his face. "There isn't much I could do at this point."  
  
"So you claim."  
  
Loki sighed and closed his eyes. Slowly, his expression drifted to perfect calmness.  
  
"I love Thor." He uttered the words with such certitude even the most cynical part of Heimdall couldn't doubt them. "It is simply..." He opened his eyes and looked around as though he hoped to find an answer carved onto the floor. "Complicated, I suppose."  
  
Heimdall turned his back to the stars and sat down on the pedestal, maintaining a respectful distance from Loki. "The king needs his rest and appoints his eldest son as the new king. It is simple enough."  
  
"He isn't ready to be king."  
  
Privately, Heimdall agreed. Thor was an excellent man and had all the qualities a good king required barring perhaps a certain necessary ruthlessness, but he was too eager to wage war without thinking about the consequences of his actions. "Impeding his rule will do you no favours."  
  
"I know." Loki looked away. "For a time, I thought to prevent the coronation, or else cause a disturbance at it to keep him from the throne."  
  
Heimdall frowned. "I hope you understand that I cannot allow you to do so."  
  
"I wouldn't have told you if I was still planning on it." Loki shook his head. "It's Father, you see. He's gone without Odinsleep longer than he should have. This has to happen now."  
  
"I'm glad you understand." Somewhere within him, Heimdall felt an emotion he wasn't used to associating with Loki stir. Pride? No, that wasn't quite right. He rested his blade on his knees, one hand loosely on the hilt. "Yet you are concerned."  
  
Loki scoffed. "Of course. Aren't you?"  
  
"I am always concerned." It wasn't a lie. "But not overly so. We have had peace for a long time now."  
  
Loki nodded. "And there's always the chance he'll listen to Mother." He didn't sound entirely convinced.  
  
"And to you, as well." He almost smiled when Loki turned to give him a confused look. "I have observed how well you have worked together recently."  
  
Loki let out a low chuckle. "I suppose you could call it that."  
  
Silence fell. Loki's eyes were fixed on the stars once more, gazing at them with what wasn't quite a smile.  
  
Heimdall observed them in turn, but time and again his thoughts returned to his companion. Ultimately, he chose to break the silence.  
  
"Why do you keep returning here?"  
  
Loki's shoulders stiffened. He turned towards Heimdall with wide eyes.  
  
He began to chuckle.  
  
"And here I thought you had already figured it out."  
  
It was only after he inched himself next to him, carefully pushing the blade aside as he did so, placed a hand on his shoulder, and leaned forward into a kiss that a new star dawned upon Heimdall.  
  
Loki retreated slowly, his hand still resting on his pauldron, carefully scrutinising his expression. "No?"  
  
Heimdall closed his eyes, heavy and light all at once. When he opened them again, Loki was still staring at him, his head tilted, expression half uncertain, half hopeful.  
  
Though he had observed him for a long time, it only then struck Heimdall how very beautiful he was.  
  
He took a deep breath. "I cannot."  
  
Loki's shoulders fell. "Why not?"  
  
"As you said, my loyalty lies with Asgard. I cannot compromise my impartiality."  
  
"No-one can live like that."  
  
"I have thus far."  
  
Loki shook his head. "Then you haven't lived." He leaned in closer, his free hand hovering close to Heimdall's thigh. "I'm not asking you to side with me against your personal judgement. If you wish, it can be only for tonight."  
  
It was difficult to breathe. For a moment, he suspected Loki was using some kind of a charm on him, but looking around as carefully as he could, he saw no signs of one. "Even if it were for one night, you could use it as leverage if you were to become king."  
  
"I will swear any oath you wish that I won't." A hint of his earlier bitterness returned to his smile. "Besides, how likely am I ever to be king?"  
  
Heimdall grunted and averted his eyes, but made no effort to move away. Some treacherous part of him was ready to throw caution to the wind, but even the rest of him was beginning to sway. Surely, with proper oaths in place, he could remain impartial? And from the ache he felt as he allowed himself to return to studying Loki's face, he knew no matter what happened that night, he would regard him differently for the rest of eternity.  
  
Making his choice, he reached out and clasped Loki's hand. "Only for tonight, then."  
  
A dash of hope. "Agreed."  
  
"I will always place Asgard's safety first."  
  
A lopsided smile. "Agreed."  
  
"And..." Heimdall closed his eyes for the longest time that century. When he opened them, Loki was still there, still entirely real. "I would like to know why you chose me."  
  
Loki blinked. When Heimdall refused to move away his gaze, his smile slowly returned. "Because of who you are. That's all."  
  
The stars were bright that night.

 

* * *

  
  
The next time he saw Loki was the following evening, trailing after his brother and his companions on the bridge, following mutely as Thor made his demands, only briefly seeking out Heimdall's gaze in passing with a hint of an apologetic smile.  
  
Heimdall barely noticed. For the first time ever, he had failed to maintain the integrity of Asgard's borders. Neither for the first nor last time, he berated himself for having been so fully distracted the previous night. There was a decent possibility — the only one that made sense, even — that the thieves had entered the realm while he had been otherwise occupied. After all these years of unceasing vigil, he had allowed his personal feelings to come before the realm.  
  
It was thus only with a slight stab of pain that he informed the travellers that as always, he would put Asgard's safety before their return, and sent them on their way.

 

* * *

  
  
During the long night that followed he had plenty of time to ponder whether he had made the right choice. No Aesir lives were lost as of yet, but Thor's banishment and the possibility of impending war rankled his conscience.  
  
Regardless, the new king didn't blame him. He reappeared on the bridge almost immediately after his hasty, unceremonious coronation, dressed in a manner befitting his new station but with a furrowed brow and haunted eyes.  
  
"Mother says she isn't sure Father will ever wake again," he said, folding his arms and looking aside. He looked strangely young all of a sudden, his finery only serving to highlight just how unprepared he was for kingship.  
  
Heimdall ought to have offered him words of comfort, perhaps, but they would have been false: what Loki needed now wasn't coddling but an understanding that the lives of his people were in his hands. "Then you must rule. With justice."  
  
Loki nodded at the floor, a minute gesture. He finally looked up. "Where is my brother?"  
  
Heimdall focused on Midgard, his gaze sweeping across the strange buildings and the curiously dressed people before locating Thor. The former crown prince had wound up in a desert community and looked to be held in custody by a set of serious-looking Midgardians.  
  
"I must speak with him," said Loki when he relayed the information to him.  
  
He kept watching as Loki emerged in Midgard, at once transforming his clothes to better match his new surroundings, quite needlessly as only Thor, who gave a start of both surprise and pleasure upon the sight of his brother, was present to witness his costume.  
  
There were no pleasantries. "Father has fallen into Odinsleep."  
  
Heimdall straightened his back. A part of him — an unjust part, perhaps — had fully expected Loki to utter some kind of a lie, something which would keep his brother away from the throne.  
  
Thor looked down at his hands lying on his lap. "...I see."  
  
"It's different from before. Mother isn't sure if he'll ever awaken."  
  
Thor's shoulders slumped only minutely, but they did so, regardless.  
  
"No-one is blaming you," Loki added helpfully when Thor remained silent. It was obvious the words offered the polar opposite of comfort. Thor continued staring at his hands, more forlorn by the moment.  
  
Loki raised his chin. "Before it happened, he spoke to me. After he calmed down, he changed his mind regarding your exile. He now wishes for your return."  
  
As Thor looked up in surprise and renewed hope, Heimdall pondered the plausibility of this claim. His attention had been elsewhere when the All-Father succumbed to slumber, but he found the words reasonably likely to be true. Though he had been forced to put the stability of the realm first, Odin loved his eldest son dearly.  
  
"I may return?" The question was uttered with childlike simplicity.  
  
"Yes. You have already retrieved Mjolnir, haven't you?"  
  
The budding hope on Thor's face vanished. "No." At once, he appeared much smaller, shrunken despite his large frame. "I cannot raise it."  
  
Loki reached forward and placed a hand on his shoulder. Thor looked at it as though he didn't actually see it. "It's only a matter of time. I know you, Thor. You are worthy of the hammer."  
  
Thor nodded sombrely, evidently not quite taking his brother by his word. Still, the hopelessness etched around his eyes eased somewhat.  
  
Heimdall took this moment to take a quick scan through the other worlds. When he looked back some moments later he froze, not quite comprehending what he was seeing.  
  
Loki's hand was still on Thor's shoulder, a rare gesture of camaraderie between two people who generally only touched each other in the midst of fighting. He had leaned in closer, as if to whisper some secret in Thor's ear, but the angle wasn't quite right. Both their eyes were shut.  
  
Their lips were locked together.  
  
They broke away before Heimdall could be be entirely sure he had seen what he thought he had seen, and immediately afterwards Loki vanished from view just as an officious-looking Midgardian entered through the door he had stood by the moment before.  
  
Mechanically, Heimdall recalled him to Asgard.  
  
Loki returned with his head held high, already back in his robes. He met Heimdall's stare steadily, without so much as a sliver of shame or confusion.  
  
As he walked past, his fingers briefly touched Heimdall's arm.  
  
It took considerably more willpower than usual for Heimdall to check the other realms before returning his attention to Asgard.

 

* * *

  
  
It was a mere hour later that Lady Sif and The Warriors Three walked across the Bifrost.  
  
Fandral cleared his throat. "We wish to—"  
  
"To travel to Midgard, to assist Thor," Heimdall interrupted, not so much looking at Fandral as looking through him.  
  
Volstagg's shoulders lowered and he gave a look to the others loudly stating _I told you so._  
  
Hogun stepped forward. "May we?"  
  
"The king requests it, does he not?" Heimdall turned his back, expecting them to follow.  
  
The Warriors Three stomped to their places around the dome, but Lady Sif remained where she had stood, staring up at him with a pensive eye.  
  
"Heimdall," she said. "You know that I trust your judgement."  
  
Heimdall allowed the compliment to sweep past him without emotion. "What do you wish to know?"  
  
She cleared her throat. "You already know Loki summoned us and asked us to go aid Thor in his task to reclaim Mjolnir." Her tone was curious: it combined the certainty of merely making sure they were on the same page and a lingering doubt that appeared wholly separate from it.  
  
He looked on without confirming her words.  
  
"What I want to know is," Lady Sif hesitated, but only momentarily, then continued with a steady voice. "What do you think of this? Why do you think he would do this?"  
  
The word _mischief_ hung silently between them.  
  
Heimdall exhaled. "There is never certainty in such matters." He fixed the full force of his gaze on Lady Sif. "However, I believe the king is sincerely anxious for the crown prince's return."  
  
Here, Lady Sif frowned — perhaps she had heard the bitterness which shouldn't have belonged to his voice — but she quickly recovered and nodded. "We shall return as soon as we can. With him, of course."  
  
Heimdall sent them on their way with the usual calmness he felt while operating the bridge, and looked on to ensure they landed safely in the sandy wasteland as close to Thor as possible, hoping they were indeed sent there for their supposed purpose and not simply to remove them from Asgard.

 

* * *

  
  
Loki returned much sooner than he had anticipated, more modestly dressed than before yet wielding Gungnir. "How does Thor fare?"  
  
"He has been reunited with his comrades. They have found refuge in the halls of a hospitable Midgardian woman." Heimdall kept his voice as bland as he could, as though reporting on the weather. Never again would he let his personal feelings hamper his responsibility to the people.  
  
"Good." Loki raised his chin. "I must go to Jotunheim at once."  
  
Heimdall turned to obey, but not without misgivings gnawing at his chest. It was true the diplomatic relations between Asgard and Jotunheim had been sorely tested, and equally possible Thor's banishment wouldn't be enough to prevent war, but how well would Loki fare at conciliatory diplomacy?  
  
"Should you not take a guard with you?" he asked just before lowering the blade.  
  
"No. My plans must remain a secret if they are to succeed." Here, Loki smiled, the first smile Heimdall had witnessed on his face since his ascension to the throne. There was something odd just behind his eyes he didn't have a name for. "I know you will bring me back in time."  
  
There was never a guarantee, but he had no desire to argue the point. He sent Loki down to Jotunheim.  
  
When he returned, Heimdall was ready to confront him. "What reason would you have to cloak yourself from my gaze?"  
  
Loki straightened his robes at a leisurely pace before acknowledging his accusation. "I told you that this mission relies on the utmost secrecy."  
  
"So you do not trust me."  
  
"I'd trust you with my very life." This again was uttered in that rare, startlingly sincere tone accompanied by the unwavering gaze of his bright eyes.  
  
Heimdall was taken aback, but persisted, for the sake of the realm. "You didn't cloak yourself when you visited your brother."  
  
"Like I said, I trust you." Loki stepped past him, then turned to face him at the entrance. "And now, I need you to trust me."  
  
"You are not making it easy."  
  
"Perhaps not. But I can guarantee that what I'm doing is necessary to put an end to our conflict with Jotunheim as swiftly and bloodlessly as possible. We must conserve out strength for future dangers." Their eyes met. "You don't have to believe I want what's best for Asgard. But surely you can believe I wish for my brother's safe return, and if that requires peace with Jotunheim, that is precisely what we shall have."  
  
Heimdall's mind flashed back to what he had seen in Midgard, and his throat felt dry. Pushing personal feelings aside, however, what Loki said was true: having witnessed something so scandalous, he absolutely could believe Loki wanted stability for Asgard, even if it was for the entirely wrong reasons. And since Heimdall himself yearned for that above all...  
  
He inclined his head. "As you say, my king."  
  
Perhaps he merely imagined the flash of remorse in Loki's eyes. "Good. You won't regret this."  
  
Heimdall fervently wished he could believe him.

 

* * *

  
  
It was all he could do to remain at his post when the frost giants led by King Laufey himself entered the realm. He could only look on in horror at the assassination attempt, and then with growing suspicion at the bloody manner in which it was thwarted. He allowed Loki, this time accompanied by a full retinue of guards, to return to Jotunheim to proclaim the death of their sovereign, and to sue for peace greatly favouring the Aesir. He witnessed the obvious hatred on the face of Laufey's eldest son as he mutely agreed to the demands of the gleaming king of Asgard, already plotting murderous revenge.  
  
So, this was the kind of diplomacy Asgard would be known for from now on.  
  
He looked on as the people of Asgard hailed Loki as a hero, as the saviour of the All-Father and their entire realm. He looked on as Frigga embraced her son, relieved beyond words. He looked on as Loki reassumed the throne with a serene, benevolent expression, and proclaimed a celebration to honour his father and the land.  
  
And he looked on, weeks later, as Thor flew to the Bifrost, Mjolnir triumphantly clutched in his hand once more, and recalled his companions back to Asgard when they called for him a moment later. He looked on as they trekked across the bridge, chastened and bone tired yet pleased with themselves, and followed their procession to the throne room, where Loki rose from his seat, and descending down the steps, welcomed his brother with a loving embrace.  
  
He didn't bother witnessing the celebratory feast, but spent the occasion ensuring the perimeters of the realm were safe, and seeing what sort, if any, kind of vengeance the Jotuns were actually planning. Likewise, he kept his eyes away from the palace as the feast finally ended and a tired calm fell upon the land, though he well knew not all of Asgard was sleeping. Instead, he carefully peered at all lands from Alfheim to Nidavellir for any possible hidden threats.  
  
It wasn't till the first hours of the morning, when he was quite certain the rest of Asgard was finally asleep, that Loki came walking across the Bifrost. He wore neither his helm nor carried Gungnir: in fact, his robes were plainer than any Heimdall had seen him in for months.  
  
He paused at the entrance of the dome, levelly meeting Heimdall's stare. "Thor thinks I should continue as king till Father awakes."  
  
Heimdall nodded. "I assume that pleases you."  
  
Loki looked away. "Mother thinks Father will yet awaken one day, but that we should allow him to sleep for as long as possible."  
  
Heimdall didn't reply. He merely fixed his eyes on Loki's face and waited for him to continue.  
  
He didn't.  
  
"Why are you here?" Heimdall finally asked, squeezing the hilt of his sword. "I sorely hope it is not to thank me for my part in your scheme."  
  
Loki had the temerity to smile. "You may not believe it, but the death of their king makes the frost giants reconsider any plans for war. Their new king is the cautious sort, and would rather not test our defences."  
  
"How can you be so certain?"  
  
"Perhaps it will make sense once I tell you what my goal is."  
  
Heimdall waited. Loki stood close enough that all it would take was a quick lunge to bury his blade in his chest. Treason, yes, but he half anticipated what he was about to hear was treason tenfold.  
  
Loki's eyes flitted to the sword, as though he had read his thoughts, then spread his hands to show he was unarmed. "There was a boy who grew up in Asgard, always treated as lesser despite his best efforts, and who wanted nothing more than for his brother to see him as his equal." He paused. "Just this once, I thought I would give that boy everything he ever dreamed of."  
  
Heimdall's eyes narrowed. "At what cost?"  
  
Loki smiled and continued as though there had been no interruption. "And hopefully, I could at the same time prevent Asgard's destruction and the ensuing deaths of both you and I."  
  
Time came to a standstill.  
  
"...What did you say?"  
  
"This isn't the first time we've lived through this time," Loki continued cheerfully, clearly expecting Heimdall to follow along or else not caring that he was still trying to process the startling proclamation. "One day, our realm will be destroyed, and half of every world will soon follow. Even Thor, for all his might, can do nothing. As for me, well," he raised his hands further up and smiled a smile that wasn't a smile. "Thanos decides to dispose of me before he disposes of the rest of the universe. It makes stabbing him in the back a tad challenging."  
  
"Thanos?" Heimdall asked flatly, not really expecting a response or even particularly wishing for one. Assuming what Loki was saying was the truth — and he had the curious feeling, fuelled by the mad gleam in Loki's eye which he realised he had witnessed before, though carefully masked at the time — the only thing that mattered was that Asgard risked extinction.  
  
He shook himself out of his astonishment. "What are you trying to tell me?"  
  
"Simply that what I said before is true. I really am working for the sake of Asgard." His smile faded. "The only way we have of preventing Thanos' victory is to ensure he never gets his hands on everything he requires for his victory. Which is why I'm here."  
  
Heimdall allowed the tip of his sword to rest against the floor and waited. He had a feeling there would be much more to come.  
  
And sure enough, Loki continued. "At first, we travelled closer to our current time. Tony Stark intercepted me moments before Thanos attacked our vessel and sent me back in time to ensure the Tesseract was destroyed when the rest of Asgard was." He grinned when Heimdall gave a start. "Only, it didn't work. That cube is made of sterner stuff."  
  
"And therefore..." Heimdall began, ignoring the unfamiliar names and focusing on the essential as the full horror of the situation dawned on him.  
  
"And therefore we keep travelling further back in time, trying different paths until we find one where Thanos never even find us." He paused abruptly, turning to look at the peaceful Asgard glimmering in starlight beyond the bridge. "This could be the one to survive. I will only know once I return to the future and see where we are. And if not," he shrugged, "we will try something else."  
  
"No matter the cost," Heimdall murmured before he could stop himself.  
  
Loki gave him a sidelong glance. "I thought you of all people would understand." He smiled again. "Believe it or not, you have thwarted my plans in previous timelines almost as many times as Thanos himself, simply by being as steadfast as you are."  
  
"And that was why you decided to..." Heimdall couldn't finish the sentence. He thought he had buried the pain somewhere from where it could never reach him, but now it reared its head, raw and all the more biting because of how unfamiliar the emotion was.  
  
Loki stopped smiling. He closed the distance between the two of them and, when Heimdall didn't respond to this invasion of his personal space, placed his hand on his arm and leaned up to place his lips on his.  
  
The kiss was as brief as their first one, on a night so similar yet worlds away, and all the more fleeting, but Heimdall felt a curious fluttering when Loki lowered himself back to the ground, looking pensive.  
  
"Who knows?" he finally said. His tone was teasing, but his eyes were anything but: there again was the tinge Heimdall had taken to be regret upon his return from Jotunheim.  
  
Before he had time to press the look into memory, Loki turned away. "From tomorrow, the one who will dwell here is the me who originally lived in this time. I have left him instructions for dealing with upcoming events, but they are never entirely accurate. Your watch will be more important than ever."  
  
"I understand." Likewise, Heimdall thought he understood why Loki had told him all this. He seemed genuinely relieved now, without the anxious energy he had concealed under nonchalance and careful poise. Likely his secret had been eating him from the inside.  
  
And now, he had taken the burden and placed it squarely on Heimdall's shoulders, instead.  
  
When their eyes next met, Loki's expression was a cipher. "If he comes here, don't be cruel to him. None of this is his fault."  
  
"I do not make a habit of being cruel."  
  
"No. I trust you don't."  
  
Heimdall watched after him till he walked off the bridge, then averted his gaze. He chose to believe he had imagined the words he thought Loki had whispered as he turned away. He wouldn't thank him. Not now.  
  
He walked into the dome and stared at the stars. What was he to make of Loki's strange story? Was it all a lie to cover for his crimes, or worse yet, the unvarnished truth? What lay ahead of the Aesir, and what would it mean for Asgard, this Asgard, _his_ Asgard, if Loki's attempts to alter the future had failed and he would travel back yet again?  
  
Slowly, he raised his hands to touch his face, brushing his fingertips across where their final kiss still lingered.  
  
Then, he straightened his back, secured his sword, and continued his ceaseless vigil over Asgard.


End file.
